• victoriaeasa

Relational Life Therapy was born…

As I've said, I am certified in a method of Couples' Therapy called Relational Life Therapy, created by Terry Real. And while already certified, I am also on a coaching call 3x/month to better my skills. I *really* love this work!

Terry recently posted this info on his method so I decided to share:

Relational Life Therapy was born…

...and it’s different from the traditional therapy models I learned in graduate school and text books.

We take sides. We trust our intuition.

We’re not above our clients as experts. We are not below them as facilitators.

We bring our full selves into encounters with our clients.

We are real.

That’s just the start of how Relational Life Therapy is unlike traditional models:

--1. We are concerned with healing from shame AND correcting the “other” self esteem disorder of grandiosity.

--2. We are not neutral. We take sides. We tell the truth to power.

--3. We are directive and unafraid to tell people what to do - and the consequences if they refuse.

--4. We focus on creating swift and permanent character change - we believe it’s possible and we set high expectations.

--5. We do individual work in the presence of the partner to create more compassion and understanding.

--6. We are fellow travelers with our clients and selectively share our own personal experiences.

--7. We deal with the subjective realities of each partner and help them negotiate their perspectives as a team.

--8. We go further than empathy and nurturing - we coach, confront, and teach.

--9. We teach couples to achieve true intimacy by consciously being aware of each other and meeting at a shared connection point.


If this sounds interesting and you'd like to learn more and/or work with me, reach out! Check out my services page to learn more about how I can help you, or contact me today to book a session.

3 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Some Thoughts on the Movie "Soul"

Who’s seen the movie “Soul?” If you haven’t, what I’m posting here shouldn’t give anything away… For those who have, that scene near the end, where 22 is talking to herself really spoke to me. *I’m n

Shame vs Guilt

Let’s look again at guilt vs shame. According to Brene Brown, “guilt” is behaviorable and actionable, “fixable.” **I did a bad thing “Shame,” on the other hand, is character-ological (is that a word?

The Three Modes of Negotiation

Relational Life Therapy Recognizes Three Modes of Negotiation: Invitation Request Demand An Invitation is all about the other person. I “invite” you to do this and it is completely up to you if you pa