There’s something counter-intuitive about a healthy marriage...
There’s something counter-intuitive about a healthy marriage… we have to get healthy and make the changes FOR OURSELVES, not for our spouses. I know how weird that sounds, yet hear me out and it will make sense.
When we make the changes for our spouse (for the sake of pronouns, I’ll make it myself and my husband and I’m the one who needs to change)… if I’m only changing for him, the second he stops “nagging me,” I stop changing again and go back to my old ways. And that becomes our new pattern. I relax, he nags, I change, he stops nagging. He stops nagging, I relax again. See?
When I make the changes FOR MYSELF, and I’m happier and healthier anyway, he doesn’t have to nag me anymore. Why would I resume unhealthy behaviors and attitudes if I’m healthier and HAPPIER?! When I do it for myself, it does make me happy. So I continue with the healthy behaviors.